Packing 101

As a very kinky person who flies in and out of domestic & international airports pretty regularly, there are a few things I’d like to share.

• If you’re in chastity, make sure you take the device OFF prior to getting to the airport. This goes for metal cages AND plastic ones, because even plastic cages often feature metal screws, joint reinforcements, or locks. Stow it in your carry on, and put it on AFTER you’re through security.
• Avoid wearing clothing with metal embellishment and be prepared to remove your belt (dodge underwire bras, steel-boned corsets, buckles, chains, O rings, D rings, spikes, studs, etc.  Stow them in your baggage and wear them later.)
• Watch out for too many batteries. I know, I know, for those of us who love our kinky toys (or just vanilla electronics), it seems smart to bring a few extra. Unfortunately, batteries are one of the things that kinda light up like Christmas trees in the X-Ray machine, so if you are bringing spares, space them out a bit, and bury them in the depths of your suitcase.
• NEVER place your kinky toys and accessories in a place that will be visible when removing your laptop, boarding pass, passport, game console, or baggie containing liquid items. I always place mine towards the bottom of the suitcase, in the back, buried beneath my clothes.
• Don’t look nervous. Seriously. If you keep glancing from your baggage to the TSA agents, to the X-Ray machine, and back again with a worried/stressed expression, you might as well wear a sign saying “Next ‘Random’ security check HERE.”
• Do your best to travel light & use carry on only for the most privacy. Checked baggage is subject to random searches just like passengers. If you do check your bags & feel the need to lock them, only use TSA approved locks. Other types of locks basically scream “Open Me NOW” to TSA, and you can pretty much guarantee they’ll be destroyed and your bags rifled through by security before they reach you (unless of course, they join the 1,000’s of bags lost by airlines each year).

A Special Note Regarding the “Mile High Club”

After 9/11, it became illegal to engage in certain activities on-board standard commercial flights, including nookie. If the flight crew catches you trying to join the mile high club, and decides to press charges, it’s a felony. Don’t do it.

Make it part of your bucket list to hire a private charter flight with a bedroom area sectioned off on board the plane. Clear it with the pilot, and you can fuck to your heart’s content while flying. It’s the only way to legally join the Mile High Club these days on any flights originating within the USA, or operated by airlines registered in the US.

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